Big changes, short week

Wish me luck, and perseverance

A few days ago I was worried that I might be heading into yet another hypomanic episode. I don’t think I am.

I’ve taken that worry and turned it into a gift. I’m slowly changing the way I interact with social media. It was taking up far too much of my time, and the mindless scrolling was deadening me. I’ve tried several times to reduce my usage, but never really succeeded.

I turned the router off for several hours a day at the beginning of this week, and the increase in peace of mind is amazing. I’ve removed Facebook and YouTube from my phone, and left my iPad off my network for most of the day - connecting only when I feel I have something to say.

Even better, I’ve modified my scrolling habits. I no longer check out everything that’s fed to me. I’ve managed to nudge my algorithm to give me mostly history, literature, influencers from cultures other than my own, and actual friends. When I do find myself watching videos I’ve been fed, I ask myself some questions: is this really relevant to my interests? Is it unkind, or cruel? Is it ignorant, or even flat-out stupid? If so, STOP.

I still have channels I follow for entertainment, but I now use them as a quick break.

I’ve also reduced my exposure to news to a couple of hours a day. I do a minimal check of a couple of online newspapers during the day. I listen to NPR news programming, but if the headlines aren’t screaming at me, I only half-listen. National news whipsaws so quickly that I’m tired of trying to keep up; what is happening today has little or no relevance to today or tomorrow.

As a result, I’m listening to more music, reading a LOT more, and in general, living more intentionally. I’ve been able to focus well enough to watch two movies - something I haven’t been able to do for a long time.

It’s not hypomania, even though I have two books going at once, shifting from one to another throughout the day. They’re on different subjects, so that hypomanic “tell” doesn’t apply.

I’ve known for a while that my intake of social media was, if not killing me, at least making me ill. This week I’ve gained some control over it. I really, really hope I can keep it up.

Comments welcome.